Learn How Happiness Can Be Painful

He said nothing
even when mouth wide open.

Obviously we are done,
nothing good comes anymore.

We fake it so well.

Why do we all change? Why will there never be constant loving? Why must I put up with this fight no matter how rough and defeating it gets? Is it all because I have this once-in-a-lifetime existence? A chance to make it right? What is right and what is wrong? I simply loved you and it all changed anyway. Now we are nothing but friends who still remember to call when it's our birthday. That's as good as it gets. Memories. And the strength to create new ones with that newfound attraction. The same strength that will be weakened by past failures. Of despair and regrets, of hurt and betrayal, of pain and suffering.

But I can honestly say, it's all worth the torment even if genuine happiness means a fleeting moment. I simply cannot spend the rest of my remaining days fearing pain. It is an act of a coward who is in denial that with every cut, will we then trickle blood of happiness. Profound it seems but it does make sense. It's called the pain of happiness. A funeral, a childbirth, the ultimate experience that comes at the apex of the most pain for sportsmen, and the crucifixion of Jesus.

So don't hide because you fear pain. If you do, you're only denying yourself from real happiness. You will only cook up an extremely bitter soup that you don't even know you're capable of. A self-destructive, self-inflicted time bomb.

KA-BOOOOM!!!

In other words, fucking reach out your hand, call my number and date me okay?

27 comments:

  1. I love reading your entries.

    Couldn't agree more on this. But sometimes, that fear of getting hurt overwhelms despite craving for that fleeting moment of happiness. Meh. Maybe someday I'll feel differently? People keep telling me I have the lamest excuses for not wanting to be with anyone. Hahaha.

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    1. When you are ready, muster the strength to put yourself out there again okay? I am sure someone will devour you. AGAIN :P

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    2. hahahahaha. that makes me sound so.. sexy and delicious! hahaha. XD

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    3. You are what you eat. If you think sexy and delicious, we will taste sexy and delicious :P

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    4. as wrong as it sounds, time to hunt for a sexy guy to eat then!

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    5. Sure can stomach an entire guy or not? Buahahahaha! Your mouth must be
      ginormous!!

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    6. i'll have little bites! XD

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    7. beauty is pain. although in this case the pain is his.

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  2. I'm sure one of the comments would be "What's your number" or similar =)

    Cheer up. If it's meant to be, it's meant to be and both of you won't be able to run away from each other. And since you are waiting the other person to pick up the phone to call you, why not you do that instead (or perhaps you've done that).

    Happy Labour Day!

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    1. Thanks for caring. I was just reflecting on something that has happened long ago. I've never been happier really. :)

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    2. Awwww... Thanks for sharing your bitter sweet story with us. Glad to know you are happy now. Life goes on whether we are happy or sad. The choice is in our hands (so to say). Of course, when you've experienced bitterness, you will appreciate the sweetness that comes after that even more.

      Things always happen for a reason. =)

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  3. i so termesmerize with your voice i will date you lor but ... hehe.. you smoke de leh... i think i saw in one of your vids.. or was it not... why must you smoke leh?!?!?! hahahaha.. wasted... lolll.. jkjk...

    im wearing a tank top and its8 degrees now plus its foggy here in the north east.. the cold makes me think home when im one day away from exam is not making things any better.. i miss eating at night.. i dont know why am i writing this here.. haha. suddenly feel like crying......................... oh well...

    i just need a break ba...

    happy holidays today.. tomorrow for me.. haha..

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    1. You terpenggung izzit? Now I wonder how round your punggung is :P Yeah, actually I do smoke. Wait for my coming entry, there is a little moment dedicated to you :) Why you suddenly pour your moment of loneliness here? You should blog about it instead :)

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    2. what is terpenggung? terpegun is it? maybe la.. lol.. my punggung is erm.. hahahahaha.. *shy*..

      anyway.. cant wait for your entry la.. i just woke up and saw my email full comments here! haha.. this entry is boomz la..

      and im totally loving your header, i assume thats you :) sho sexy one.. ok la now i got dirty thoughts liao.. hahahaha...

      have fun the rest of the week ba CP.. *hugs*

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    3. eee yes TERPEGUN.... my Bahasa Melayu SUCKS big time lah I know you very the geng wan..... you Fatimah yang kat tepi jalan jual duku langsat wan rite? MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

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  4. This is really nicely written.. Really gets me thinking.. :)

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    1. Yes, when I wrote it, the words just fall into place. I guess this is what happens when you are truly inspired to write. Other than inspiring moments, I will end up writing crap.

      REACH OUT BOY! REACH OUT!

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  5. *Hugs*
    Btw 'pain of happiness' sounds so masochist. =P

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    1. Sounds kinky rite? U have no idea how much pain is involved when I am exercising in bed. But it's an ultimate pain of pleasure. Fu-yoh!

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  6. yeah, true enough..just like the third law of motion, for every motion/force, there will an equal force on the opposite direction..we cant exert something without causing some friction along the way :)

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  7. Beautifully written... One that encapsulate all the essence and yet, retaining its gracious form... One that stimulate both side of our mind... the left and the right... =)

    Gem indeed =)

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    1. I am glad it inspired you like how it did to me. :) Thanks for visiting btw.

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  8. marry me plz.

    What you're saying is right in many ways. In Psychology, we learn that everything is relative. Not in real life, but in our minds, and since we perceive everything with our minds, everything, while not physically relative, is relative to us.

    As in, to feel happy is just to diverge positively on your regular mood. And to be depressed is just to dip down low on your regular happiness.

    :Lazy to elaborate but... in conclusion : the more pain and depression you feel, the happier you are able to be.

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    1. Marry? Let's hold hands first and make sure you don't have sweaty palms k?

      Yes, I am fucking depressed all the time and simultaneously I wet myself. Just kidding :P

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